Going Deeper

“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear” 1 John 4:18a

We stood on the shore as the waves broke. My 8-year-old daughter wanted so much to play with friends that were in deeper water, but she was scared to pass through the wave breaks. Fear of being caught in the surf paralyzed her, and she refused to move forward. We held her hand and told her we would walk with her. We told her that the worst part was the break, but once you got past that, it would be worth it. However, since she wasn’t sure if that was really true, she had to decide if she was going to trust us. Eventually, she decided she would let my husband carry her out past the waves. Fear turned into joy. Hesitancy turned into confidence.

Man, how I relate to my sweet girl. I want to go deeper with the Lord, but struggle to get past my fear of the unknown. Oftentimes, I’m plagued by doubt. I want to give my undivided “Yes”, but worry what will happen. Or when there are circumstances that seem too heavy or out of my control, much like a heavy surf, I struggle to have peace. Or sometimes, circumstances are not what we would have chosen, and when we have to step out into the unknown to move forward to an uncertain future, we are, frankly, not sure we can handle the outcome. Yet, healthy fear serves a purpose too. A healthy sense of awe and respect for what could happen instills wisdom and discernment. But when we believe the lie that fear can protect us at all costs or that all things depend on us, we stop living. We become enslaved to fear. The problem is not the fear but what we do with it and how we feed it.

“When it comes to the slippery slope of overwhelming fear, if you’re not intentional about getting back on the road, you run the risk of only sliding sideways. Because you mostly only work hard to avoid the thing that knocked you off the path, you also stop moving toward the things that make you come alive.” Layla Palmer, from Coming Home.

If we’re not intentional about pushing past our fears, our fears will begin to control us. At these times, I love the truth and promise that comes from 1 John 4:18,19:

“There is no fear in love, perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. We love because he first loved us.”  

The Greek word for “cast” is to cast out, send, throw down, or thrust. It almost gives me the image of an olympic shot put where an athlete throws a heavy metal ball called a shot as far as he can by methods of gliding or spinning to go as far as it can. But, in this particular case it’s the Lord’s perfect love that throws violently away this fear. So, why do I worry? Why do I fear? The word for perfect here denotes completion, to become mature, to be made perfect in the sense of bringing to a state of completion or fulfillment. Verse 19 states who is doing the maturing.

“We love because he first loved us.” 1 John 4:19

Christ loves us completely, perfectly. It is not because of anything we have done or could ever do. Let that sink in.

He later goes on to say:

“Everyone who believes that Jesus is the Christ has been born of God, and everyone who loves the Father loves whoever has been born of him. By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and obey his commandments. For this is the love of God, that we keep his commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome. For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world.” 1 John 5:1-4a

Sometimes we have to make the commitment or do the thing while being scared. I know, I hate it too! But what gets me through is focusing on the perfector of my faith and the way He loves us. And if He is in it, there is goodness on the other side. There is freedom. And if I make a mistake, he can redeem it. Praise God!

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.” Hebrews 12:1-2

So, Jesus, in His unimaginable sorrow, focused on the “joy that was set before him” in order to walk through the hardest time of His human life. He focused on his love for us and his obedience to his father.

My two-year-old loves when we read about Jesus in the storm. I’m not sure what it is about this particular story, but she asks to read it all the time. For those who are not familiar, Jesus and his disciples have gone over to the other side of the lake, and a furious storm occurs. Where is Jesus? Sleeping in peace. What are the disciples doing? Scared for their lives. They wake Jesus up and accuse Him of not caring. But he immediately stills the storm and asks them where their faith is. They look at each other and marvel at the bigness of God, the fact that he controls the wind and the waves. They had no need to be afraid. But they forgot.

I forget too, sometimes.

I had the privilege of getting to listen to Bethany Hamilton earlier this year at a homeschool convention. Most everyone knows of her comeback story after losing her arm to shark attack at the tender age of 13 and getting back up on the surfboard soon after. Today, she is arguably one of the most famous surfers in the world. She talked about the aftermath of her injury. Her faith in the Lord helped her to have gratitude even though her life had been undeniably altered.

“I felt thankful that I was alive, and I believed that God had a plan for my life.” —Bethany Hamilton

When asked about fear, she admits to being initially scared to get back in, but refused to let her fear define her more than her love of surfing. She believed that God had a greater purpose for her life even if it looked differently than she thought. Her faith gave her stability and purpose in the storm.

“So much good and beauty and positive things have come from the loss of my arm. God had a better plan than I did.” —Bethany Hamilton

So, she started baby steps of getting back out there, surrounded herself with a community that supported her and assessed her risk. She went from not being able to paddle out to shore to winning major competitions. She went from thinking about a shark attack frequently to not thinking about it much at all. She talks about the things that she would have missed out if she had never moved forward in faith and persevered. She asked “what would be the ripple effect if she gave up?” Now, she talks about how this is influencing her as a mother and raising her kids, which is a completely different journey. That got me thinking. We’re all afraid of different things. Fear is contagious, but so is love. What do we want our lives to reflect?

So, what can we do?

• Focus on gratitude.

• Take one small step toward walking toward your fear.

• Surround yourself with people who point you to Jesus. I am so grateful for the ladies that inspire me with their courage and cheer me on to move forward.

• Pray about all things, big and small. Know that Jesus loves you with a perfect kind of love. It is not his heart to senselessly afflict you. (Lamentations 3:33)

• Focus on who is really in control. Thankfully, it’s not me or you.

• Value rest the way the Lord values rest.

• Remembering what the Lord has done in the past, gives great confidence for what he will do in the future. Remind yourself of how the Lord has worked in the past in impossible situations.

Here are some other scriptures that help settle my spirit when the waves of fear want to knock me off my walk.

“And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together.” Colossians 1:17

“I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and curse. Therefore choose life, that you and your offspring may live,” Deuteronomy 30:19

“Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.” Lamentations 3:22

Sisters, I’m praying today that we will have the confidence to walk away from fear into the best love of our life. He will never disappoint and never leaves us alone in our struggle.