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Caught Up in the Stream of His Grace

Have you ever felt stuck in a cycle? Like there are things in your life- habits, longings, sin - that you feel powerless to stop? It’s like, you know the thing that you want to do, but it just feels near impossible to do? 

Last week, I found myself caught in a current of scrolling on my phone. It was like I was swept away and I couldn’t stop. I would eventually get fed up, leave my phone in another room and try to go about my life...only to find myself sometime later making my way back into to the swirling whirlpool that is my phone. 

I know that this pull that my phone has on me is a symptom of a deep desire and longing. I know it. I know that the only way to break its hold on me is to get caught up in the current of the Lord. I. Know. It. 

But my flesh had been fed and this feeding of the flesh only begets more hunger. 

I stumbled into my room one afternoon, shut the door and sat on the floor. I deleted all of the apps that held the desire of my heart. I used my phone, previously the means by which I fed my flesh, to pull up worship music, thereby forcing this device to now participate in the starving of my flesh and the feeding of my spirit. 

I set my Bible in my lap and I sat still and I came to Jesus, lowly and needy and weak, knowing that He would move towards me in the pitiful state I found myself in. He only moves toward us. Especially when we are so greatly in need of His grace and mercy. 

He came. Just as His Word promises. It is astounding that He can come and in that instant, everything else just falls away. Just a moment of being still before Him, of opening up the Word, of fixing our eyes on Jesus can transform us. Even if we have to push through several moments of discomfort, of offense to our flesh. If we will persevere even then, in an instant, He can come and transform us! 

And in those moments, even if we come so stuffed full of the world and devoid of any hunger for Jesus, for our real life, He feeds us with Himself and this feeding begets even greater hunger for more of Him. 

What a Savior! 

The next morning, I arose early, hearing His call instead of the call of my phone. I went and sat before Him and heard, “John 6:16.” Here is what I found as I opened my Bible: 

When evening came, his disciples went down to the sea, got into a boat, and started across the sea to Capernaum. It was now dark, and Jesus had not yet come to them. The sea became rough because a strong wind was blowing. When they had rowed about three or four miles, they saw Jesus walking on the sea and coming near the boat, and they were frightened. But he said to them, “It is I; do not be afraid.” Then they were glad to take him into the boat, and immediately the boat was at the land to which they were going.”

Can you imagine how exhausting it must have been to have rowed and rowed and rowed against the churning sea? For three or four miles

They were pushing and pulling and laboring so hard, with all their strength. But it wasn’t until they took their hands up off of the oars and let Jesus into their boat that they made it to the land they were going. 

And what did He tell them? “It is I. Do not be afraid.” 

If you are stuck today in a current of sin and shame, trying with all of your might to clean yourself up and so, so tired- do not be afraid. Do not be ashamed. Do not keep hiding from the Lover of your soul. Let Him be your Hiding Place, your refuge and your strong tower. See how He is a very present help in your time of need. 

It is I. Do not be afraid.” 

Who is He? He is Jesus, the One who died for you, while you were yet a sinner and while you were an enemy in your mind toward Him. He is the One who knows man and what is in man’s heart and still gave Himself willingly. He is the One who is your Advocate. He is the One who moves toward you and never away. He is the One who will in no wise cast out (John 6:36). 

Come to Him. Today. 

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