Fasting. The Lord has been saying that word to me over and over for a couple of months now. I haven’t known exactly what to do with it. Obviously I should fast, but from what? And for why? I struggled for awhile because I was concerned about my motivations behind agreeing to a fast. Is it because I just wanted to feel better? To lose a few pounds? Why was I really choosing to fast? What was I hoping to achieve with this fast? If the answer didn’t have some spiritual element to it, I was concerned I was just choosing to fast for selfish reasons. And yet… “FASTING” still rang loud and clear in my head and heart and I just knew it was the Lord. 


Just last week, I had a friend invite me and some other people to do a 40-day fast together… from sugar. 


If God had not already been saying “fast” to me, I would have said, “no thank you” to that invitation! Y’all. We just wrapped up the holidays which means I just wrapped up about 5 pounds on my person after all the lazing around, cookies, pies, and sweets. And soda… oh mercy. I need a soda once a day to survive the chaos that is my life. 


That last sentence right there is why I knew that I needed THIS fast. 


“I need a soda once a day to survive the chaos that is my life.”


I hit my limit and then I run to caffeine and carbonation to sustain me instead of Jesus. That hurts to admit, but it’s just plain true. Stop right here and ask yourself, “Where do you run when you hit your limit near the end of the day?” I’m not talking when your world falls apart, it’s easy to run to Jesus for the really big things, but what about the small things that we try to handle on our own? What do you need to help you handle it? What is your “soda”?


My eyes have been opened by one small sentence uttered in the corner of my mind as I read the introduction to the book guiding our fast. “I need a soda once a day to survive the chaos that is my life.” I can’t even handle a single day of my life without some sort of help. And to be truthful, soda may help for a moment, but it’s hurting me in so many other ways.


Weight gain.


Sore and achy muscles.


Sugar/caffeine crash.


Anxiety and irritation.


Addiction.


Trying to fill Jesus’ role in my life.




OUCH. That last one is painful, but I was confronted with that truth. I am turning to a sugary can of carbonation that is only hurting me in the long-run instead of the Living Water who only ever brings good into my life.


Why am I not just turning to Jesus? How did I get here? 


Thinking about the fast coming up, I started to get very afraid of failure. “There’s no way I’ll be able to abstain from sugar for 40 days, I can hardly make it a day!” “Wow. How weak am I? I am afraid of putting down sugar for a few weeks.” “You’re just a fatty.” “You will fail at this.” “Other people know you’re fasting so they are all going to watch you fail because you cannot do this.” 


Notice how the thoughts in my head went from me voicing my fears to the enemy making accusations? 


When we allow fear-filled thoughts to swirl around in our minds, we open the door for the enemy to come and torture us. We start thinking his thoughts about us. We start believing lies about us and about God’s heart for us.


What happens when we take those fear-filled thoughts and questions and present them to the Lord instead of ruminating on them ourselves? He gives us hope for uncertainty. 


I wrote in my journal all the reasons why I knew I was going to fail at this fast. All the reasons I was afraid to do this fast. I didn’t just confess these things to myself, I was confessing them to God. What happened next began a change in me… I gave him all my fears and uncertainties and in return, he handed me hope. My thoughts changed from questions and doubts to hopes and dreams. 


What if this crippling anxiety eases up as I quit turning to sugar and turn to Jesus? 


What if my body quits aching as I turn to Jesus over sugar?


What if my kids see a difference in me throughout the day?


What if my husband sees my attitude change?


What if our home is filled with more peace and joy… just because I let go of sugar and grabbed hold of Jesus?


What if I gain infinitely more than I lose in the next 40 days?


What if people see more of Jesus in me after this?


What if I hear His voice more clearly?


What if I crave his presence and am filled to overflowing?


What if I’m a new person on the other side of this?




Maybe you aren’t planning a fast. Maybe you’re thinking about one now! Go through this exercise written below and then allow the Lord to bring to your attention whatever your next step should be. Just take some time today to ask yourself, “What am I turning to instead of Jesus just to make it through the day?” If you’re like me, after answering that question and then thinking about giving it up… your mind may start swirling with fear. Maybe you don’t need to even answer that question for fear to start swirling. You may be walking through deep waters right now and are already filled with fear and uncertainty. 


Whatever you’re going through, don’t allow the enemy to terrorize your thought-life by dwelling on uncertainty and fear. You don’t have to pretend those thoughts don’t exist. Burying our thoughts and emotions that are negative or uncomfortable doesn’t actually get rid of them. They’ll crop up in other ways. We can’t escape those things this side of heaven. You can’t just wish them away… you have to take them to the throne room. Those fears, questions, pains, sorrows… those all belong at the feet of Jesus, not stuffed in a forgotten corner of your mind or dark crevice of your heart. Share them with the Lord and allow him to give you hope in place of your uncertainty. Trade your sorrows for joy, your uncertainty for peace, and your fear for hope. 


Here’s the take-away:

1. Evaluate yourself honestly: What do I turn to in order to get through my day?
   
   
2. Write down all the reasons why giving that up will hurt, be too hard, is impossible, etc.
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3. Bring those reasons to God. Let him show you the truth about what that “crutch" is actually doing for you. Let him give you hope and show you what turning to Him, craving Him over your crutch will do in your life. I’ll bet there’s a new level of freedom waiting for you on the other side of that “yes” to God. 

Something God has been speaking to me about a lot over the past year is my purpose. It’s not as complicated as I thought it would be. It’s not as glamorous as I’ve hoped it would be. It’s not as mysterious as I assumed it would be. It’s not as boring as I’ve worried it would be. 

My purpose is incredibly simple. It’s utterly beautiful. It’s completely fulfilling. And I’m convinced it is your purpose too…

To be eternally happy in Jesus. 

That’s it! It’s not some big chore. It’s not some complicated process. It’s not self-glorifying and glamorous. It’s not inaccessible and frustrating. It’s simple and beautiful and fulfilling. 

Psalm 16:11 says…

You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

The Lord has been speaking this over me for a little more than a year now and I have to tell you - it has challenged my doctrine and the belief system I’ve carried for a long time. I’d spent most of my life believing that happiness is fine and dandy, but it’s secondary to holiness. I’d come to view the pursuit of happiness as self-serving and a form of idolatry. My mentality was that my lack of happiness could be worn as a sort of spiritual badge. “Look at me. I’m not completely, incandescently happy and that means I’m not a self-indulgent idolater.” Really what that says is, “I love God so much that I’m not happy! I serve God so much that I’m not happy! I spend so much time with God that I’m not happy!” 

What a TERRIBLE testimony to the character and heart of our Lord - the CREATOR of happiness! And where in the world does it say anything like that in the Bible?

Let me tell you something the Lord taught me…

Happiness in Jesus is the only path to true holiness. 

If you come out of time spent with Jesus and you’re still grumpy, I wonder, did you really meet with Jesus? Oh I’m not saying you didn’t read the Word! I’m not saying you weren’t just praying. But were you WITH Jesus all that time or were you working through the actions of holiness without the heart of happiness?

When Jesus becomes our everything - our hopes, our dreams, our passion, our fulfillment, our source of love and acceptance, our source of empowerment and transformation, our confidence and assurance - why wouldn’t we be happy? And the happiness in being near the Lord, the Creator of the Universe who spoke the stars into existence and still thought the world needed YOU - gives us the desire to please him and allow him to transform us into a holy people!

John Piper shares an excellent illustration for this concept. I’ll do my best not to butcher it…

Imagine if your spouse showed up at your door this evening after work and rang the doorbell instead of walking straight in. When you answer the door, he is standing there in his best suit with a bouquet of your favorite flowers and asks you on a date with him tonight. He says he has the kids taken care of, all the details are planned, all you have to do is go get dressed. If you were to ask, “Why? What made you go to all this trouble?” And he were to answer, “Well it’s my duty as your husband to do the right things. It’s my job. So I’m fulfilling my obligation as your husband to do nice things for you,” would that just let the air out of the room? That would kill the romance for me. But what if he were to answer, “Because nothing makes me happier than to see you smile and to watch your heart overflow! I am happiest when I make your heart glad! There is nothing more fulfilling to me than to bring you pleasure, my dear.” 

STAHP. 

Would you think that was a selfish answer? Is that the wrong motivation? No way! It’s the same way with us and God. Are we obeying and growing in holiness because it’s our role as His child? Because it’s our duty as a Christian? Because we are supposed to? 

Or are we obeying God and growing in holiness because nothing is more fulfilling and nothing makes our heart happier than to see the Father happy! To bring pleasure to God! 

Okay, I’m not saying any of this to cause marriage problems for you so, remember your spouse is human - they are NOT JESUS - and you GET to be the love of Jesus to them. This story really isn’t about them. It’s about us. So let’s refocus on us and Jesus (because I know some of us ladies struggle here…)

Do you want to get to that place with Jesus? I know I do. Can I share with you a few things I’ve learned along the way while on this journey with the Lord over the past year? 

If our purpose is to be eternally happy in Jesus - how do we fulfill that purpose when we just aren’t happy? In my uneducated opinion, when we are unhappy it’s because we have some areas of our lives out of alignment and it’s wearing our heart down which is going to cause a blowout eventually (did you catch my subtle tire analogy there? I just had some car work done and learned a couple things…)

Here are the three places to check for alignment issues:

1. GRATITUDE 

When I am unhappy, the vast majority of time, it is because I am focused on crummy circumstances, painful relationships, frustrations at home or work, and am generally discontented with my life. 

My husband has a practice with our children that I’ve come to adopt for myself. When one of our kids starts to flip their lid and lose control or get super negative, my husband sits them down and gently asks them to list 3-5 (depending on how emotional things are) things they are thankful to God for. Usually they don’t want to do it at first; they want to stay mad or sad. Isn’t that just like us though? We get to our pity party and don’t want the party to end, probably because it’s justifying our bad behavior (ouch!) and we don’t want to own up to our poor choices. Anyway - once the kids start listing things that they are grateful for, it never fails, by about 2 or 3 in the list, smiles start to creep over their faces and they can finish the list with giggles. 

It may take more than 2 or 3 on your list because, let’s face it, being a grown up is a little more complicated than being a kid. But maybe that’s why Jesus told us we need to have childlike faith to enter the kingdom. We need to quit overanalyzing and nuancing every single issue in our lives. IT’S MAKING US MISERABLE, SIS! Let’s just keep it simple. We have so much to be thankful for and it’s time to refocus our eyes and hearts to our gratitude list and start reaching smiles and giggles by 2 or 3!


2. SURRENDER

This one is hard. I know. But sometimes we just aren’t happy because we aren’t willing to let go of our stuff and say YES to God. This is a trust issue. When we struggle to hand things over to God it is because there is a part of our heart and mind that just doesn’t believe He can handle it, that He’ll do the right thing, that He is for us - not against us. We don’t trust Him. 

Do you know how to overcome this? There are 2 steps to overcoming here… that’s it. Here they are:

1. Read your Bible. If you read it, you’ll see His character and His track record. Spoiler: He’s good and He always wins. And when you are on His team - you’re going to win too.
2. Just do it. That’s harder than it sounds. I know. You’re preaching to the choir. Girl… I know. But it’s still true. Listen… you want to grow in faith? Then you have to just hand things over and sweat it out while you wait to see just how trustworthy He is, sis. And I promise you - I’d bet all my worldly possessions on this fact - He is trustworthy. 100% of the time. 
   
   

 3. PRESENCE

If you aren’t happy, there’s a good chance you aren’t spending much time in His presence. You may be spending time reading the Bible - you can read the Bible and miss that this is the very voice of God speaking his love over you right in that moment. You may be praying - we can talk to God and forget to listen to His precious voice speaking truth over us and breaking off every lie we have chosen to believe. You may be going to church - we can attend church and miss God’s Spirit moving and speaking and ready to heal in the room. 

Get in His presence with a heart to see Him, hear Him, and know Him. And if we do it looking for Him to DO something for us rather than just to BE with us - we may miss Him. I have found that when my heart is just to be near to God, not to have him fix all my problems, his very presence is enough. I don’t need answers. I don’t need problems gone. I don’t need finances restored. I don’t need relationships perfect. I just need His presence and that is ENOUGH for my heart. That is where I’m fulfilled. Not because he fixes my problems - which he does that sometimes - but because his presence fills my heart and that’s what I really am needing. 

So sister, what is out of alignment in your heart today? What is keeping you from stepping into the fullness of joy only found in His presence? What needs to adjust so that you can live out your true purpose and be eternally happy in Jesus?

Lord Jesus, we know that You alone fill all our holes and gaps. You alone put healing salve on deep, deep wounds. You alone give hope everlasting. You alone give beauty for ashes and joy for mourning. I pray for my sisters today who aren’t happy. For sisters who are hurting and struggling. For my tired and weary sisters. For my brokenhearted sisters. For my sisters who are angry and the ones who are afraid. You are the lifter of heads so we call on You to fulfill your Word and lift their heads up to you and your glorious face right now, Jesus. Just looking into your face changes everything, Lord. We need YOU. Help us to know that. Bring us that revelation in our minds and our hearts. That YOU are the answer - not what you can do - but who YOU are. We want to be eternally happy in YOU Jesus. Show us where you are ready to bring an alignment in our hearts and we’ll submit that to you Jesus. Help us to trust you. We believe… would you help us with our unbelief? We know you are good, you are faithful, you are loving, you are redeemer, you are hope and salvation. Remind us of that truth now, Lord, as we draw close to you today.

When I was a young teenager, I was really into reading these books for teens on spiritual warfare. The books followed the lives of a brother and sister who had spiritual encounters with the occult, the demonic, witchcraft, etc. They were written in a way that showed God always overcomes evil and the importance of the Armor of God, however, they scared me to death. So much of the book was written to help the readers see that the occult is nothing to delve into while the brother and sister and the power of God didn't overcome evil until the climax of the book - as every good suspense book is written. But as a young teenager, this made me VERY afraid of the devil.  ​
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I had read the scriptures and grown up in Bible-teaching churches and a Christian family. I knew the devil was out to kill, steal, and destroy. He is the accuser of God's people. He isn't someone to poke a stick at. After reading those books, I had nightmares. Terrible ones. I could tell you story after story of nights when I woke up paralyzed by fear, hardly having a voice to pray and ask for help. This waned for a time, but shortly after I moved to an area that was inundated with witchcraft the dreams came back. The overwhelming fear came back. The spiritual oppression came back full force. I would wake up and feel like my voice disappeared. I would wake up and feel a presence in my room. If my voice came back, I would just start worshipping and saying out loud, "Jesus is Lord. Jesus is Lord. Jesus is Lord." I felt like the darkness was haunting and taunting me.  

Listen. We are NOT meant to live this way. We are NOT meant to be afraid of the dark, afraid of the demonic, afraid of the enemy. We are NOT meant to hide and cower until he goes away and leaves us alone. We are NOT meant to look for the devil hiding behind every bush in every circumstance. Let's not give him that much credit. He doesn't have any power over us unless we hand it over to him.  

I began to understand this about 8 years ago, but God has been showing me some new things about where I stand with the devil.  

I have heard it said so many times by believers, "greater levels, greater devils." Maybe that's true, I can't say for sure. I don't see much of a biblical precedent for that, but circumstantially speaking, the statement seems to carry some weight. "Greater levels, greater devils" is a statement that implies that the closer we get to God, the more the enemy is going to attack us. The attacks will get greater and greater, harder and harder as we draw near to God and his plan.  
I don't know that I fully subscribe to that statement. I think sometimes that may be true, but I don't know if that is a steadfast rule for every believer.  

There is a verse in the New Testament (1 John 3:8) that says Jesus came to "destroy the works of the devil." So if I think about it beyond Jesus' 33 years on earth, I have to understand something very important. The devil is still prowling the earth looking for who he can devour, he is still the prince and power of the air, he hasn't been thrown into the lake of fire yet. Jesus ascended into heaven and gave us his Spirit who gives us access to ALL of God's power. ALL of it. Not just some of it, but ALL of it. Did we get that? The power that raised dead men to life, healed the sick, and made blind people see is LIVING INSIDE OF US. And we have FULL ACCESS to that. On top of that, we are made to walk in the footsteps of Christ, fulfilling the mission he has put before us. Our lives and paths may look different, but we are purposed and equipped to DESTROY THE WORKS OF THE DEVIL, just like Jesus. We aren't on the defense y'all! We are offensive players. We are STALKING the darkness.  

I think each time we submit more fully to God and begin to fulfill our purpose, we come up against a spiritual wall. We enter into enemy territory and we are purposed to DESTROY the enemy in that territory. That territory belongs to God and we are the ones to TAKE IT BACK for God. We walk in a constant state of victory because our brother, Jesus, extended all of his power to us. We have full access to the resources of heaven and perfect victory, but it's up to us to go to God and receive it.  

We are not made to be afraid of the enemy. We are made new in Christ so that he is AFRAID OF US. We are made to stalk the darkness, take back territory, and reign as sons and daughters of the most powerful, most loving, most righteous, most holy, most gracious, MOST HIGH GOD. El Elyon.  

We have nothing to fear for our God is with us. Emmanuel. He provides the resources to secure the victory. Jehovah-Jireh. We have ranking over the enemy because we belong to the Almighty God. El Shaddai.  
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So let's stop cowering in fear. Let's stop doing what keeps us safe and start doing what we were purposed to do: 
STALK the darkness. DESTROY the works of the devil. TAKE BACK territory.

Leadership has been a regular topic of conversation between my father and I since I was about 8 years old. I remember sitting on his knee after a friend in the neighborhood treated me poorly and didn’t keep her word. I was in tears and instead of scooping me up, telling me it was going to be okay, and leaving it at that, my father scooped me up, talked me through how to make things right with her, and helped me learn that I can create boundaries and communicate to others what is acceptable in our relationship and what is not. These were some of my first conversations centered on leadership that I can remember. And they haven’t stopped since. 

Anytime I hit a wall in a relationship - professionally or personally, anytime I run into an obstacle I don’t know how to overcome, anytime things get sticky or fragile and I can’t risk being too clumsy in my approach to solving a problem, I ALWAYS call my dad. I have avoided so many “fatal” errors in my life and my different leadership roles because I called my dad before I made a rash decision. I sought council instead of flying by the seat of my pants. I’ve saved myself so many headaches and have learned so many invaluable lessons in leadership… I’ve been a much better leader to people because I called my dad first. 

Getting ready to write this article, I had a million leadership “lessons” I could have shared from my father’s wisdom. He’s been in leadership positions professionally for almost 40 years. He’s learned a lot and I’ve gleaned from that field time and time again. Initially, I figured I’d write something about, “How to deal with conflict resolution,” or “Team building,” and how those things factor into work AND home life… or something of that nature. 

However, I felt the Lord pull me in a direction I really didn’t want to go, to be quite frank. But I realized that it was something I desperately needed to hear at one point in my life and maybe there are some of you that need to hear this right now. So here goes…

Leadership After Failure.

Have you ever been in a leadership position - in any capacity - and done something so spectacularly stupid that you almost (or did) burned your life to the ground? 

“Where do I go from here?” 
“God will never allow me to lead again.”
“How could He ever entrust other people to me again?”
“That’s it. Those dreams are gone now.”
“I threw away everything and there’s no getting it back.”
“Will anyone ever trust me again?”
“Should anyone ever trust me again?”

All those thoughts ran through my head on repeat several years ago after I had a metaphorical loose thread on a sweater that I kept tugging at and tugging at until the entire thing unraveled - my entire LIFE unraveled. I had a problem I should have handled differently. I should have sought help other places. I should have seen the signs. I should have reached out to the right people. Instead, I stayed hidden, dealt with it the way I wanted to, and ignored God while trying to do His work. I was trying to lead well in His name at home and at work all the while suffering and inadvertently inflicting more suffering upon myself and those around me.

Spectacular failure.

I hit a wall. My world caught on fire - a fire that I started myself - and I was standing in the ashes of my own indiscretion, selfishness, and inept leadership. 

Listen to me. I was getting out of the shower a few days after my spectacular failure and I was reeling in the aftermath of that failure when I heard the Lord say, “Did David lose his anointing after Bathsheba? Did I remove his crown? Did I take him from his throne? Did I choose a new king?”

I stood in that bathroom and cried. I couldn’t believe what the Lord was saying to me! How was he possibly so generous? I sinned against Him and others and, yet, He did not take away my anointing - the thing He purposed me for and set me aside to do. He did not remove my garment of praise and return to me a cloak of mourning. He still had a job for me. His will and purpose was not swayed by my sin. But why was that? How could He still hold me so dear? How did He not see me as despicable? Here’s what I think…

Because my spirit was broken and my heart contrite before Him.  

I wasn’t blaming anyone else for my failure at this point. The whole world knew and there was no hiding anymore. I failed. I wasn’t hiding from Him any longer either. He was all I had to hold onto and I was hanging onto the hem of his cloak for dear life believing that just His nearness could make me whole again. 

The Lord can do a lot with that, sweet friend. 

In the coming months, the Lord did an unbelievable and miraculous work in my life. He brought so much healing to me physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. He brought healing to my family and our future. Hope was set before us and we could see it clearly when our eyes were on Jesus because all of our hope was in Him. Leadership looked different for me for awhile. Things changed because of failure, that was true, but my purpose remained. My anointing retained. My calling the same. The Lord helped show me how to lead well after the fire. And a lot of conversations with my dad helped too. 

All of us lead. Maybe at work, at home, or some other sphere. And I’m convinced we all start a fire in our leadership at some point. Maybe it’s a spectacular fire and you burn the whole forest down. Maybe it’s small and easy to stop the spread. Maybe your fire took out the entire west coast. Whatever your failure looks like - a spectacular one or a minor blunder - we all have to figure out leadership after the fire. 

So what do you do after the fire? How do you lead well? Here’s a few things I’ve learned…

1. Call your dad.  Your heavenly Father knows exactly what to do. So call on Him. Make Him your priority and He will take care of the rest, He will lead you to your next step, He will teach you how to rebuild your life, He will guide you to love people well, He is your everything. And it’s not just after a fire, sis. That’s an important lesson we all need to learn yet many of us don't until we burn the forest down. So if you haven’t set any fires yet - learn this now. It’s just Jesus. It always was and it always will be. 
2. Own up to your mistakes and humble yourself. This one is so hard. It’s easier to find other people to blame, at least in part, because it’s hard to look at ourselves in the mirror after fires. However, it is vitally important to take responsibility for our actions and make it known to the people you’ve hurt. Ask forgiveness. Do the hard work. Humble yourself. We can’t be right with God when we’ve got pride still lurking in our hearts.
3. Shame died on the cross. If you belong to Jesus Christ, shame has no hold on you. You don’t have to wallow in guilt and shame and self-hatred for any length of time to prove you are repentant. What is repentance? It literally means to change your mind and to turn around. It doesn’t mean to hate yourself and sulk until you’ve paid your penance. So shake off that shame at the foot of the cross right where it belongs because it doesn’t belong on your shoulders, sis. That’s a lie that will keep you from pursuing Jesus wholeheartedly and experiencing real healing. Repent - if you weren’t pursuing Jesus when you failed, do that now. If you weren’t thinking with the mind of Christ when you failed, take every thought captive and submit it to Christ - change your mind!
4. Say yes when He calls again. Because He will, sweet friend. He isn’t done with you. You aren’t damaged goods. YOU aren’t a failure. Failure is an event, not a person! Failure does not define you, degrade you, or defeat you when you are in Christ Jesus. If you are wallowing in your failure, you will miss His voice as He calls you into new leadership. So set your eyes, open your ears, and say yes when He calls. 

Leadership is difficult and can be scary. It forces us to grow, challenges us to mature, and leads us to places we sometimes don’t want to go, but, as Jesus lovers, leadership is a beautiful gift. It’s an avenue that grows us into His likeness. So press into it. And when failure comes, because it always does, remember this:

Failure is an event, not a person.

Failure does not define you, degrade you, or defeat you when you are in Christ Jesus. 

“For My hand made all these things, thus all these things came into being,” declares the Lord. “But to this one I will look, to him who is humble and contrite of spirit, and who trembles at My word.” Isaiah 66:2​

“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise.” Psalm 51:17

“For thus says the high and exalted One who lives forever, whose name is Holy, “I dwell on a high and holy place, and also with the contrite and lowly of spirit in order to revive the spirit of the lowly and to revive the heart of the contrite.”
Isaiah 57:15

Read more from Lyndsay @ www.lyndsayterry.com
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As quickly as our lives have slowed down, so many of us have somehow found a way to busy ourselves again, filling our days with non-stop information, interactions, noise, and to-do lists. 

FOCUS seems a hard thing to discipline ourselves to do when everything moves at the speed of light and the entire wealth of information the world has to offer is one google search away. We've been conditioned to want instant gratification and accept nothing less than "right now". Our attention spans have shortened drastically. Is reading more than an short article or the max amount of characters in a tweet a challenge for you sometimes? I practically fall asleep every time I attempt to read a regular book!

FOCUS feels distant and BLURRY feels more realistic. Can you relate?

It's hard to be a Mary in a world built for Marthas! But, sis, we were made to put aside the day's work for a time - it will be there when we are done - and sit at the feet of Jesus. We were made to give him our whole hearts, our whole minds, and our whole attention everyday. Have you taken the time to do that yet?

We aren't looking to drop some wisdom on you today - we are looking to point you to the Giver of all wisdom. Today, we are hoping to give you space to FOCUS on Jesus through some scripture for reflection, worship music for soaking, and a  prayer to pray today. 

WORSHIP PLAYLIST

Instrumental Worship  

Top 40 Worship (August 2020)

Traditional Worship

SCRIPTURES FOR MEDITATION

Joshua 1:8
Psalm 77:12-13
Psalm 143:5
Psalm 145:5
Psalm 19:14
Psalm 113:3
James 4:8
Philippians 4:8
Psalm 63:6
Psalm 16:8
Psalm 92:1-2
Psalm 42:1
Jeremiah 29:13
Jeremiah 24:7
Isaiah 26:3
Psalm 112:7
Psalm 91:14-15
Colossians 3:1-2
Philippians 3:13-14
Hebrews 12:1-2
Hebrews 3:1
Proverbs 5:1-2
Proverbs 4:25-27
Psalm 119:6
Jonah 2:7
Colossians 3:23-24
Matthew 6:24
Matthew 6:33
Romans 8:5
Proverbs 16:3
​1 Corinthians 10:31

MEDITATION PRAYER (Rebecca Barlow Jordan)
Lord, quiet my heart and still my soul as I wait on you during these moments alone. I recognize you as a holy and majestic God - one who deserves great praise and glory. All of creation testifies to your awesome and unique works. There is no one like you, no other god worthy of honor.

I want to focus on You, Lord, and to shut out all the distractions of the world. For these next few moments, it's just you and me, God. You are Spirit, but you are a God who knows us so intimately. I like to imagine you as literally sitting here beside me, because of your promise that you are Emmanuel - always "with us."

As I think about the truths in your Word, may the meditation of my heart be sweet and honoring to you. I am not trying to clear out my mind. I simply want to empty me of self and fill me with your Holy Spirit.

I long for your presence, Lord. Narrow my thoughts to include only those things that are honorable, truthful, beautiful, pure, and praiseworthy. I ask for your wisdom to apply these truths to my life morning, noon, and night - literally all through the day. For you are worthy to be praised all the time.

I remember your great faithfulness in the past and am so grateful that you shower fresh mercy and grace on me each morning. I rehearse your goodness through answered prayer and personal reminders to me daily of your love for me. Even when I feel alone or distant from you, you draw me back into your presence when I purposely slow down and draw close to you. I treasure your Word and want to chew on the truths you reveal to me today. As I pull apart each piece and relect on every principle and word of instruction, I'm asking you to guide me and teach me what you want me to know.

Is there a promise here for me to remember? Is there an action I need to take or a sin to forsake? Is there more for me to understand about your character? Help me to personalize your message to my heart today. Your Word is powerful. I celebrate the strength and wisdom you will give me as I learn to honor and glorify you more.

I need you and love you, Lord. And I ask you to speak through your Word and in these quiet moments together. Whisper or shout into my spirit, whichever you want, and whatever I need the most. But most of all, just receive my praise as I focus my thoughts only on you. I'm listening and anticipating as I read and meditate on your beautiful Word. 

In Jesus' name, Amen.



Sisters, we want to encourage you to join us on the Community today. We'll be there ready to hear what God is sharing with you as you focus and turn your ears and eyes on Him today. What is He teaching you? Where is He leading you? What is He showing you?

How can we partner with you as you passionately pursue Him today?

Focus. 

Y’all. When I was scheduled to write on the topic of “focus”… I should probably just spend time telling you all the things that focus ISN’T. All the things that mess with your focus. All the ways to lose focus. Because, let me tell you, I am no expert in this area.

In September 2017 my life was a wreck. My husband and I were working hard at rebuilding our marriage into something beautiful after we had just about run it into the ground, I was trying to rebuild my relationship with Jesus after I had spent too much time neglecting it and running from Him, we were trying to make new friends in a new place, a new home, and a new church. September 2017 was kind of a mess and yet, that is the place and time the Lord spoke so clearly to me: “Write.” 

Excuse me… come again? “Write.” I was in the middle of a staff meeting at my new job. We were in the middle of prayer and I heard the Lord as clear as a bell, “Write.” I remember thinking, “about what?” And immediately the Lord said, “Full portion God.” 

He gave me the name… of a book. My book.

I tried to shake that thought out of my head right away. I was the worst candidate to write a book on anything, especially concerning spiritual things. Don’t get me wrong, I am a deeply spiritual person, but I was a deeply messed up person at the time and I knew God must have been confused for a minute there because I could have sworn he told me to write a book about Him. But He really did tell me to write and I couldn’t ignore it. We were praying and as soon as I heard “full portion God” I pulled out my pen and paper and started furiously scribbling all of the thoughts flooding into my mind. I still have the notes from that moment. The Lord just pricked my spirit and my mind took off running like my life depended on it. I went home and, in secret, began to write. 

I didn’t tell anyone because I was embarrassed. I was a colossal screw-up. Who did I think I was to write a book for the Lord? I was not smart enough or good enough or holy enough or experienced enough or any other kind of "enough" there was to be. It just wasn’t me and I knew it and so did everyone else. So I couldn’t tell a soul. Too many people knew my history and I couldn’t face the ridicule that would spew out over me if anyone knew I was writing a book. So I wrote in secret for a couple months. Here and there, whenever inspiration would strike, I would grab my laptop and write. 

In January 2018 my husband and I were just beginning to teach a class at our church on the gift of prophecy when we found out we were pregnant with our third child. We could not have been more ecstatic and grateful and hope-filled. We wanted to have a baby and we could not believe how easily it happened this time around as it had been a struggle before. Just two days after we found out we were pregnant, I woke up to spotting and fear. The day progressed and things just got worse. There was no stopping it. We were losing our child we had only loved for two days. The baby we had already been dreaming of holding and kissing and loving was slipping away and I could do nothing but watch and wait and groan in pain, both physically and emotionally - the greatest pain my heart could know. 

About a week later, I knew I needed to get back to this prophetic class with my husband. I needed to be immersed in the presence of God and actively listening to his voice and direction. I was scared someone would say “I’m sorry for your loss” or “how are you doing?” and I would lose it, but I went anyway. I just needed it and I couldn’t explain how or why, but I knew I did.

That first evening back, the Lord gave a friend of mine a prophetic word that he didn’t understand, but oh my gracious, I knew exactly what God was saying…

“I see a blank sheet of white lined paper. And it’s coming into focus, the way you would focus the lens on a projector. Laser-like focus,” he said. I about jumped out of my chair when he said, “laser-like focus.” He had no idea the Lord had told me to write. And I knew the Lord was saying, “I gave you an assignment. You better set your sights on your paper with a laser-like focus to obey me.” 

It was not the message I had expected or even hoped to hear that evening. I wanted to be scooped up and held. I wanted to hear “Your baby is here in my arms,” or “You’ll be pregnant again in [fill in the month here].” I wanted to hear about my baby or the hopes of another child… not about this book. And yet, the Lord was speaking to me about the book, not the baby.

Listen to me, sweet friend. Sometimes the Lord is going to speak to you about the book when you are focused on the baby. Your heart and mind and soul may be wrapped up in the baby because that is where the trauma is, that is where the heartache is, that is were the wounding is. But friend, that may not be where His focus is. And I know that can hurt to hear because we want the Lord to be focused on the things WE are focused on. But that is just not how it works. His thoughts are above our own. His ways are above ours. He is on a whole different level.

After January 2018, I lost focus. My eyes were locked on our baby. My eyes were locked on my pain. My eyes were flooded with loss. My focus shifted from God’s calling to just surviving one day to the next. And it went on like this for almost a year. 

December 2018, just a week before Christmas, I found out we were pregnant again. I was so scared, so excited, so anxious, and so hopeful all at once. My focus shifted once again from survival, to planning and building a future for our expanding family. 

The spring of 2019, I began a discipleship group with 5 other ladies… the nitty-gritty kind that forces you do deal with all of your junk and get right with Jesus. Well… I got right with Jesus, okay? With the encouragement (and harassment - ahem - I mean accountability) of my discipleship group, I started to write again. I was reminded of the calling the Lord gave me in 2017 and the prophetic word from a year before in 2018. The Lord had told me to do something and I had allowed my vision to get hijacked by everything happening all around me. I had allowed my focus to blur, to shift, to change, to move from the book to the baby. 

This time was so different. A year previous, I had given up on writing because of the heartbreaking loss of a child and now here I was writing while carrying a new life inside of me. A new life breathed into this child and a new life breathed into me and this book. It was a strange sense of coming full-circle and quite literally rewriting my painful past into something more beautiful now. 

My daughter, Abigail Rose, was born in August 2019. After she was born, I wrote here and there, but things really slowed down. I was focused on the baby again instead of the book. However, at the beginning on 2020, I asked the Lord for a word for the year - something to help direct my attention to what He has for me - and I heard, “focus.” I knew it was primarily about the book. I had promised the Lord I would finish he first-draft by May. And you know what? I did. The first draft is completed and I feel more completed. I know it’s not done, there’s more to do, but I feel a spiritual milestone in this place. A monument to a new level of spiritual maturity has been built by the hands of long-suffering and continued obedience. 

This is a long story to bring you to this point…

What is your “book”? 
What is the thing God has called you to do? Maybe it’s changing careers, maybe it’s homeschooling your kids, maybe it’s starting a non-profit, maybe it’s writing a book, maybe it’s sharing Jesus with your neighbor. Whatever it is, name it - out loud. Don’t let yourself keep it a secret anymore. Own it and call it out and get some accountability. You need people to account for your ability when things pull you down or the devil is being his liar self telling you all the ways you are the wrong girl for the job. You need people in your corner cheering you on, telling you the truth about yourself, poking and prodding you to complete your metaphorical “book” and obey the Lord.

What is your “baby”? 
What is pulling your focus away from the thing God has called/commanded/asked/told you to do? It’s not always wrong to acknowledge the baby in the room. For me, of course I needed to mourn. Of course my heart and mind and focus was pulled toward this baby and the pain we were experiencing. And that is not wrong. But what I believe God wanted for me during all of that was to continue to chase after the book. To continue to obey, even through the pain, even through the tears, even though the heartache because the act of obedience is what ushers in healing and comfort and peace. The baby and the book don’t need to compete. 

How can you obey right now?
Focus simply boils down to obedience. When we obey the Lord in the small things, it keeps our eyes focused in His direction and we can more easily and fluidly move in sync with His Spirit. If I had just kept my eyes focused on Jesus during that painful period of loss, if I had just looked for ways to obey Him in the small things, I believe I would not have lost sight of the book. I would have experienced more peace when I felt so much turmoil and more strength when I felt so weak. 

Friend, obedience sharpens our vision to more clearly see the life God has intended us to live with the unique gifts, passions, callings, and purpose each of us possess. So if focus is a struggle for you, just look for one way to obey the Lord today. Just start there. He’ll bring it all into focus as you just commit to the next step of obedience in front of you.

Head over to the Community and join in the conversation!

Friend, that drive to be happy… God put that there inside of you. And it’s your job as a Jesus lover, a child of God, to FIRST and FOREMOST passionately pursue pleasure that is all-satisfying… that can only be found in Jesus Christ. Read that scripture again and soak it in…

“You make known to me the path of life…”

What questions do you have? What answers do you need? What decisions need to be made? Who are you really? Why are you here? What’s your purpose in life? HE will make known to you the path of life. He will answer those questions. He will direct your steps. He will guide you, lead you, walk alongside you. But you have to stick close. You can’t hear the voice of someone who is far away. You can’t follow along The Path of Life when you are on your own path doing your own thing. You need to be close to Jesus.

“In your presence there is fullness of joy…”

I want it. You want it. We all want it. We all NEED it! If you are a follower of Jesus and you could not be easily identified by others as a joyful person… you need to spend some more time with Jesus, sweet friend. In His presence, there isn’t just a little joy, some joy, or enough joy. It says in His presence there is FULLNESS of joy! I want to be filled to overflowing with so much joy it just leaks out all over the people around me until they are filled up too because of the presence of God in my life! Wowza! I’ve got tingles all over my arms thinking about the kind of JOY I have in the presence of God! Take notice: it doesn’t say “In your presence, sometimes there’s joy,” and it doesn’t say, “In your presence, there is joy if you [x y z].” There are no qualifiers in the statement. It’s just what happens when you step into the presence of God as His baby girl! As His beloved daughter! As His favorite kid!

“At your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” 

In his presence, there is joy overflowing. And at his right hand, which symbolizes a special place of honor, there are pleasures forevermore. Eternal, everlasting, never-ending pleasures. 

Listen. I don’t think the people of God can do the work of God and fully obey the will of God if we do not understand the position we hold in the Kingdom of God. If you feel like you have to earn it, you don’t understand what your salvation bought. Eternal life is just one part of the package. It’s a side-effect of an even greater work. Salvation found only in Jesus Christ restores you to your place as a sinless, righteous son or daughter of God. You were made for the Garden, we stepped off the Path of Life and royally screwed up the world, and lost access to the Garden which is a picture of perfect intimacy with the Father. What did Adam and Eve do in the Garden? Walk around every evening talking with God. In person. They had perfect communication with God. They were in perfect standing with God. There was absolutely no shame or hindrance between them and their Father. Joy was EASY to find. Joy was ALWAYS around because God was always around! They were FRIENDS with the God of the universe and HE was their dad! 

That is what you and I were made for! Because of sin, we lost access to God who is our eternal joy! Jesus made a way back for us by sacrificing his perfect life on behalf of our sin-filled lives so that we could be God’s kids again… so we could go back to the Garden. 

If you love Jesus and have been saved, but are still walking around like you are carrying the yoke of slavery to sin… girl, pick yourself up and dust yourself off! You are a child of God. You are the head and not the tail. The devil may strike your heal but you will crush his head. You live with the eternal, everlasting, never-ending, all-fulfilling, all-encompassing victory of Jesus over every sin in your life! If that doesn’t fill you with JOY I don’t know what will!

Pray that verse over yourself. You remind yourself that, because of Jesus Christ’s work on the cross, you have 24/7/365 from now until forever access to JOY. You tell yourself the truth…

• I don’t need to worry about all the questions. God will guide me as I stay close to hear His voice.

 

• I was made to live in the presence of God and in His presence is the fullness of JOY!

 

• I am seated with Jesus at the right hand of God - a place with pleasures forevermore!

 

• I was made for JOY and ETERNAL PLEASURE that can only be found in Jesus!

So today, go find the fullness of Joy! Go be in the presence of God. Worship, read the Word, soak up His presence, spend some time in prayer… like more than 2 minutes. Get on your knees, lay facedown, whatever… just get in His presence and get your heart back in the Garden! Your joy will start spilling out all over! I promise! 

“God is most glorified in me when I am most satisfied in Him.” - John Piper

Head over to the Community and join in the conversation!

Head over to the Community to join in the conversation!

A couple of years ago, my sis and I took our kids to a state park and did a short hike. It was only a mile long and it was supposed to end at this beach on the lake with shells and fossils. It sounded like something our kids would really get a kick out of and we both like hikes, so we hit the trail. By trail, I mean paved sidewalk for the first portion. It was idyllic... at first. Sidewalks. A pond on the right, the lake on the left. Beautiful docks, ducks swimming, birds chirping, people walking their dogs, and cute older couples snuggling up on a bench. I was enjoying this part of the hike. 

We went across a footbridge and into the woods. It was warm and muggy and there were bugs. Honestly, we were getting to the point in this short hike that I just wanted to get to that beach and kick my feet up in the sand, letting the kids run around finding shells. I was anxious to just get there already. I may not be in the best shape of my life either so when my almost two year old was done walking, carrying him (I didn't bring a baby backpack... genius, I know) felt like I was carrying a 10 lb sack of potatoes on the hike... except it was more like a 25 lb sack of potatoes that wouldn't stop whining and accidentally kicking me in the side. 

My four year old was amazed on this hike in the woods. He has grown up in the desert, we had recently moved back to Virginia, so seeing trees is new. Being surrounded by woods was like being on some alien planet. Some magical adventure. He wanted to stop at every tree root and try to pull it up from the ground. He wanted to touch every funny looking plant that we walked by. He wanted to look for rabbits, birds, bears, and monsters (which he firmly believed were real - and was unafraid). He was completely enraptured by the beauty of the woods. I was completely over it. 

I know I'm a good mom, but this was one of my less than stellar moments in parenting. Instead of letting him take his precious time along the trail, I found that I kept hurrying him along, grabbing his hand to get him back on track and insisting we speed up. I knew what was at the end of this trail was better than the trail itself. I knew he would think this beach was even greater and more magical than the woods. I knew it was flipping hot and I was carrying his cranky little brother. I couldn't have been more impatient or silently irritated. 

I'm not kidding you, God stopped me right in my tracks on that hike. I had turned around to explain for the fourteenth time that no matter how hard he yanked, those giant tree roots wouldn't come loose so he could use it as a sword, and before the words left my mouth, I heard the voice of God. "You think I'm hurrying you along in your life because the end is greater than the journey, but baby, I LOVE when you enjoy the small wonders on the way. I love when you take notice of all the hidden treasures I've put in the woods for you to find. Yes, we have a destination and yes, I will help you remember to follow the path we're walking together, but I want you to stop and look around from time to time. I want you to look back and see how far we've come. I want you to see the beauty all around you, even when you aren't there yet. Don't be in such a hurry. I'm not rushing you. I'm not irritated with you. I'm with you." 

Honestly, I so love when God gives me a parenting lesson.

Sometimes, the trees feel overwhelming. I feel swallowed up by the shadows they cast and that path is a narrow walk. Sometimes the heat and the discomfort really get to me and I'm just ready to get where we're going already. Get me out of this place, Lord. Get me to my destiny because the woods suck. I'm miserable here. I'm tired of walking. This load is too heavy to keep carrying, Lord, and it keeps kicking me when I'm already tired. Everything feels like it's slowing me down and I just want to arrive. 

If we slow down. If we decide to face those trees without fear. If we believe the shadows can't harm us, we'll see so much beauty in the journey. So much wonder in the process of destiny. He has hidden treasures in the dark places for us to find. He has made the path narrow so we don't wander too far to the right or to the left. He is with us. He isn't waiting on the other side wondering when we are going to get our act together and show up. He is with us. Emmanuel. God is with us. 

That lesson in parenting the heavenly Father taught me changed the rest of the day. It changed the rest of the days following too. So let me just encourage you the way He encouraged me...

​Baby, He has treasures and wonders hidden in the dark for you. Don't worry about showing up late. He isn't waiting at the end for you. He is with you. Don't be afraid of the darkness. It won't overtake you. It won't swallow you whole if you just grab onto His hand. He is with you. 

Emmanuel. He is with you, baby.